I keep finding myself drifting back. Back to the endless miles of dirt, snow, mud, rock, wind, smoke, ash, sky, water, darkness, light, solitude and silence. I am still on the Divide and I need to stop.
Banff, Boulton, Elkford, Sparwood and the Border. Riding through Canada on adrenalin and sheer excitement and a healthy dose of fresh legs, knees, achilles and mind. Aspen groves and raging rivers; mountain tops and mining operations; bear spray and biblical snow; forever friends were forever lost. Chasing Nanoraptors through the mud through some of the wildest country. Gatorade, chocolate milk, crackers and cheese. I could not believe I was actually racing in the TOUR DIVIDE! Racing the Rooftop! Riding the Spine! It was a euphoric high that would last forever. Wouldn't it?
Cold and rain - on the verge of hypothermia in Montana on a screaming fast - and long - downhill. GET to the bottom and thaw out. Cue sheets flying off the cockpit never to be recovered. Roosville and PBR's at the Last Chance. On to Whitefish, Seeley Lake, Butte, Wise River, Polaris, Cross Ranch and Lima. Wet chills seep to my core. Rough roads, no roads, single-track, grizzly fear and grizzly traps, new friends and no friends. Cliff Bars, Power Bars and Bars in between. Mysterious maps, mysterious towns. A century a day is a good day of work. Climbing into the clouds and the mist; rain showers, snow showers, pushing for countless hours.
Red Rock Pass and Idaho - home but far from home. Rail Trail from Hell and maddening sit-bone travails, bone sauce and Blue Steel = winning! Solitude, deep sleep, and sleepy eyes. More rail, more trail, more pain in my tail. Tetonia, Driggs, Teton Pass, cloud riding and re-routes. Rain gear on - rain gear off - repeat. Wilson and warmth, bagels and friendship. How do you want to live your race? Emotional ups, emotional downs. Erie shadows and loose gravel.
Vast, stark, harsh, magical, unnerving, and disturbing Wyoming. Pinedale, Wind River Brewing, Divide 9, South Pass, Atlantic City, Great Basin - Greater Stars! Miles of nothing and everything, sick friend with a heartbreaking end hitching a ride. Lost in the mud, prayers answered and an Angel came to me in a Camry. Mineral X Road - who are you and why are you so lonely? Why was I so lonely? Rawlins and Rednecks; Pussies in Spandex; sticks and stones.....I'm hot, hungry and in no mood. Man up and say that crap to my face cause I'm on edge and ready to take you truck load of freaks on. I dare ya!! Peace, finally, in camp - cow camp, near Middlewood Hill, near the Middle of Nowhere, under the stars, satiated, complete and content. Kaizen!
Playing in the land of 14ers on my 29er. Colorado. Race ending pain with an angry achilles the size of a baseball bat. Tears of failure; tears of disappointment - the machine is broken. No Country For Old Men! A late afternoon limp into Brush Mountain Lodge. Watermelon and lemonade - all you can eat and drink. Kirsten the Angel, the Siren, the Healer! Ice, food, beer, camaraderie, more food, sleep and up at 4am. Unfinished business so let's roll. Another steep hike-a-bike, or, more like drag-a-bike through steep and deep white stuff - again. Achilles manageable - endorphins exploding! Dave Blumenthal's last camp before he died.....Lexi and Linnaea, my thoughts were with you so often! Dave's spirit gave me strength. Steamboat: fresh drivetrain, fresh food and fresh spirit. High passes and high camps. Shag ass for Boreas Pass, son (love you Dad!), Divide 15, High Winds, Horrid South Park and Hartsell. A stealthy descent into Salida in shadows turning to darkness. Beers, friends, hospitality, late night pasta, a shower - born again! Marshall, Cochetopa and Carnero Pass; a Del Norte resupply then a grind in a HEADWIND 23 miles up Indiana Pass, elevation 11,910. Body beat but spirit high. Summitville, erosion, scars, man's hand, Superfund Site. Don't drink the water! Elwood Pass Camp - a room with a view. Broken shifter cable near Platoro (replaced), a real breakfast with real people - generous and curious. Whew, Colorado is BIG..............
Heat, fire and ash raining down in New Mexico. Rocks, sidewall fear, pushing through steep grades, no running water, no flowing water, no people, washboard from hell, taint of steel. Better stock up when you can. Canon Plaza, Vallecitos, keep riding cause you may be killed by these hostages. El Rito for the special, make that two specials and two milkshakes. A friend appears and two disappear. Abiquiu at 4pm and the sky is dark and raining ash. Chocolate milk, Gatorade, more food and a wet red bandanna for protection - I got someplace to be. Lightning wars, bolts and flashes then rain, a sweet night descent (keep the bike between the fog line and the yellow line and pray there are no animals, or rocks lying about), finally Cuba by midnight. Completely buzzed! George the Angel provides shelter from the storm. Deep sleep, big dreams and bigger breakfast. Headwinds - no surprise - Pueblo Pintado, nectar from a soda machine and Adrin wants OUT of his current life and dreams someday when he grows up of a divide race of his own to escape a terrifying reality. Pain and suffering aside, I can indeed think of easier ways to escape. I'm on a quest - let's leave it at that. Another late ride, a long pavement ride, and a most surreal ride. Watch out - Skynet towers are just on the horizon just before Grants. The Rise of the Machines! And those headlights coming from 10 miles away? Am I hallucinating? In all likelihood, yes. No-Doze only goes so far and I am way sleep deprived and fatigued to a level I've never seen before. Been hooked on the No-Doze for a couple weeks by now.........used to be an afternoon pick me up, then it became a noontime treat and the past week it was first thing out of bed along with my other meds. But back to my self contained separate/desperate reality. Things got weird in a very good way......my 'multiverse' had two layers with no connection between the two. My night world of silence and darkness with no fear and slicing through time on my bike. Brilliant stars, enormous sky! The rare car brutally shoved me through the rabbit hole and I flashed into the here and now. As Soon, I mean As Soon, as the car went by I went back through the portal and there was complete silence, brilliant stars, no cars, vanishing cars, life was in balance again and this vast new dimension was so freakin' alive! A hidden world discovered. Route 66 - Grants at midnight, Sands Motel, spoiled chocolate milk, get some sleep and don't sleep through your 4am alarm. Big push to Pie Town, downed 4 milkshakes, 2 slices of pie and loaded up with Gatorade, water and turkey sandwiches. The Gila loomed.....cattle tanks, spigots and pumps. Washboard from HELL! Shaken and Stirred! Rigid fork not advised. Plains of San Agustin. Heat, thirst, rock, did I mention the washboard? Soda machine at the work station....Root Beer in the middle of the Gila Wilderness - God's Hand! Late night push to a high camp and a ride on top of the divide for several miles. CDT Alternate shorter by 6.2 miles but longer by HOURS - hike-a-bike is my friend! Water and food about gone. Pinos Altos and two Coors with George Clooney. Silver City: 3 girls, 3 burritos, 6 tacos, 4 Pepsi's, 3 friends, Divide 29. A 5000 calorie resupply for the 123.9 miles to border. Fast slab, fast dirt and final night ride under the stars and the ocean of desert and ongoing mind-bending hallucinations. I've got pictures so I know it was real. 1:00am Bivy next to I-10, trucks howling, trains singing, alarm screaming at 4:30am. Alien activity, drug trafficking, Border Patrol, 95 degrees, Hachita and the Loneliest Highway 81. Two miles from the Border - tears, dirt, fatigue and 25 days of emotions slowly being unleashed. Seeing my forever love, Eve, I crumbled like broken child. I cried tears of joy and tears of sadness. Was it really over? Connie and the 3 wives...amazing show of love and support. 24 Days: 03 Hours: 12 minutes......Antelope Wells - International Border and Southern Terminus of the Tour Divide. My deranged dream was over.
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The Tour Divide may be a race of individuals, but for me it never could have happened with out the love and support of my family and friends. My beautiful wife, Eve, was with me every moment and at the end of a few difficult midnight phone calls, to offer support and encouragement. She sacrificed enormously to allow me to chase this dream. My amazing daughters, Erin and Ali, and their positive get-it-done attitudes kept me moving forward. My sister Connie for volunteering to take a couple vacation days to visit beautiful Antelope Wells for the finish of the race. My Dad and brother for watching over my family, and lawn, while I was gone. And my mom.....well, she's an Angel and always with me, especially on the divide!
And my friends? Wow, I am one very lucky and blessed man. Pals raised a pint at 8pm nightly and now I toast you for your love and support. I am truly honored and humbled by your friendship. And to the many others whom I don't know but offered me support in many different ways, I hope our paths cross one day and I can repay you kindness. What an incredible support crew!!
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I took a bunch of pictures and videos while riding the divide and am currently editing what I have and hope to cobble something together that I can share with family, friends, and any others interested in this race. Photos, videos and more ramblings coming soon. Plus I have a gear list - what worked and what didn't - that may be of interest to some coming soon.
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Great minds have agreed on one thing: poets go first and scientists catch up later. Do not discount your imaginings. They become your future”.
HOROSCOPE 12/8/10 ………
